I guess it would be firstly most appropriate to introduce myself. I'd hate to be uninvitingly in-your-face and flaunt out a super-bitch-attitude, but this is the Internet, and I'm trying my best to sell myself without being too much of a prostitute. Besides, that's what Jeffree Starr did and now he's... well, hm. I guess I should maybe take a different approach.
My name is Christian - almost a paradox in itself, because the Word of God seems to absolutely hate me. I was born lactose intolerant and my morals urge me to stop eating meat, making me a vegan; and, perhaps to some, automatically labels me as one of those "silly" animal rights activists. I never went to college because I've always thought I was too pretty for school. Huge mistake - I wasn't even the prom queen. But, I mean, not going to college doesn't make me an idiot or anything... right? I do yoga, I love kidney beans, and I would cut off my ears and nipples just for Channing Tatum to acknowledge my existence.
Have you assumed enough yet? Yes, I'm gay - but don't fall too deep within the stereotypes, because for all you know, I could be some x-teen girl behind a laptop, bored at work, trying to pull a Little Loca on you.
Also, this template bullshit is killing my aesthetic eye - I'll change it shortly.